JACK the spider

SEX: Male

AGE: Jack is an adult, though his age is unknown.  It’s reported that he was the spider who bit baby Tolkein, thereby placing him in Africa in 1892.  But since the source of that data is Jack himself, it is undoubtedly questionable.

SPECIES: Arachnichnid, possibly wolf spider. A BIG wolf spider.

LIKES: Ladybugs.  Though they are poisonous, Jack seems to have an immunity and drinks his fill of ladybug juice whenever possible.  His addiction to it may explain his erratic behavior.

Jack also loves to eat flies.  They are perhaps his main source of food.

DISLIKES:  For a spider, Jack is surprisingly proficient with smart phones and social media and hates internet posers.

POLITICAL AFFILIATION: Jack is a conservative-leaning spider. This doesn’t mean he’s very political, unless he’s running for office.

FRIENDS: Being s spider, Jack naturally doesn’t have any friends.  Bugs are afraid of being eaten and humans are afraid of getting bitten.  There are a few exceptions, however.

MISCELLANEOUS: Many question the fact that Jack only has six legs despite being a spider.  Jack considers this a non-issue since no one seems to have a problem with other bugs only having four limbs despite being insects.